Secret to successful flirting still lies in appearance rather than corny chat up lines

Secret to successful flirting still lies in appearance rather than corny chat up lines — but women also like intelligence and tenderness in a man

  • Experts from Cyprus surveyed around 800 people about preferred flirting traits
  • Both men and women fall for people who are well presented and charming
  • But women prefer men who appear to be possessed of intelligence and wealth
  • The team caution that a gentler approach works better than an over-eager one 

The secret to successful flirting still lies in appearance rather than corny chat up lines — but women also like intelligence and tenderness in a man, a study found.

Experts from Cyprus surveyed more than 800 volunteers — finding that men and woman both fall for people who are good looking, well dressed and charming.

Men are reportedly seen as particularly good catches if their appearance and what they said suggested that they were possessed of intelligence and wealth.

The researchers also found that the gentle approach worked best — with a suitor who was polite, respectful and did not ‘move too fast’ likely to be more successful.

The findings could help counsellors and psychologists deal with clients who have confidence issues, or problems with social interaction.

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The secret to successful flirting still lies in appearance rather than corny chat up lines — but women also like intelligence and tenderness in a man, a study found

In their study, social scientist Menelaos Apostolou of the University of Nicosia and colleagues looked at 47 different traits involved in flirting — and asked 808 volunteers to rank how likely each was to work on them.

The three highest ranked traits were humour, intelligence and good looks. 

The team found that other traits — from carrying an air of mystery to appearing determined — were in important in making flirting more effective, but ranked lower.

Women were more likely to seek a tender partner, the researchers found, while men were seen to be less interested in intelligence than good looks

Furthermore, older participants in the study reacted better to a respectful and polite manner from their would-be partner.

Humans have used flirting to attract suitable mates for centuries, the researchers said.

Traditionally, flirting was a way of showing someone else that one would be good for breeding — so men would demonstrate their strength, or reliability as a prospective father, and women their good health for motherhood.

Many of those aspects remain, though a subtle approach is now more welcome than a brash one.

Although chat up lines may never go away, it may be what is not said that is more important, the team concluded.

Experts from Cyprus surveyed more than 800 volunteers — finding that men and woman both fall for people who are good looking, well dressed and charming

Experts from Cyprus surveyed more than 800 volunteers — finding that men and woman both fall for people who are good looking, well dressed and charming

‘Making good eye contact and having a good smell would make flirting more effective,’ the researchers concluded in their paper.

‘Moreover, as indicated by the “Mystery” factor, giving the impression of a mystery and originality were elements of effective flirting.’

‘Women rated non-verbal behaviours and a gentle approach as more effective on them, while men rated good looks as more effective.’

‘Flirting is an essential aspect of human interaction and key for the formation of intimate relationships.’ 

The full findings of the study were published in the journal Personality and Individual Difference.

TOP 43 REASONS MEN ARE STILL SINGLE

Scientists led by Menelaos Apostolou from the University of Nicosia in Cyprus anonymously asked men on Reddit why they thought they were still single.

They analysed more than 6,700 comments and revealed the top 43 reasons why people are unable to find a partner.

Here is the complete list —

  1. Poor looks (including baldness, and short stature)
  2. Low self-esteem/confidence 
  3. Low effort 
  4. Not interested in relationships 
  5. Poor flirting skills 
  6. Introverted 
  7. Recently broke up 
  8. Bad experiences from previous relationships 
  9. No available women 
  10. Overweight 
  11. Different priorities 
  12. Shyness
  13. Too picky 
  14. Anxiety 
  15. Lack of time 
  16. Social awkward 
  17. Enjoying being single 
  18. Depression 
  19. Poor character 
  20. Difficult to find women to match 
  21. Poor mental health
  22. Lack of achievements 
  23. Stuck with one girl 
  24. Lack of social skills 
  25. Have not got over previous relationship 
  26. Don’t know how to start a relationship 
  27. Lack of money 
  28. I do not trust women 
  29. Not picking up clues of interest
  30. Sexual issue 
  31. Fear of relationships 
  32. ‘I am not interesting’
  33. Fear of rejection 
  34. ‘I will not be a good partner’ 
  35. Attracted to the wrong women
  36. Homosexual 
  37. Given up
  38. Is not worth the effort 
  39. Fear of commitment 
  40. Health — disability issue
  41. Difficult to keep a relationship 
  42. Addictions
  43. Other